Are problems in your marriage getting swept under the rug because there’s no time to talk? Join Michael Farris as he and his pastor, Joe Holman, talk about making time to communicate, today on Home School Heartbeat.
Joe, I’ve come to the conclusion that so often marriages get in trouble because people just stop talking. What’s the deal here? It seems like there’s such an obvious solution that a lot of people are missing. What’s your experience?
Mike, let me say that this is really the number one problem, I believe, in marriages. It’s a lack of communication—not just limited to the homeschooling, but in every area of the marriage relationship. It seems like the longer we’re married, the more we assume and the less we speak. And I guess this is okay, you know, if you’re working in a production factory and dealing with things; but in a home, and in a marriage, it’s a relationship involving people.
And what I think we need to do is make our communicating a priority. The Bible says, “Out of the abundance of the heart the mouth speaks” (Matthew 12:34). Well, sometimes out of the abundance of the heart, the mouth is silent. And I think we need to take our hearts before God and make sure that our sincere desire is to meet the needs of our spouse, and then express that to them and listen from them to find out what their needs really are.
Joe, I've long believed that for men, we believe that communication is mostly a matter of transmitting data, when in reality, when we’re building a communication pattern with our wives that really communicates love, most important is to listen and to listen fully and to keep asking questions that will allow your wife to fully speak her heart. When we do that, that’s real communication that's going to work and going to last. I’m Mike Farris.