Home School Heartbeat Radio Program

Mike Smith:
Lou, you use a great metaphor in your book on teen anger, Getting a Grip. Distressing emotions are like a smoke detector. What do you mean by that?

Lou Priolo:
Well Mike, most of us would never seek the help of a physician unless we’re in some kind of physical pain. And the same is true with counselors—most people don’t come for counseling unless they’re in some kind of emotional distress. And so pain, whether it’s physical or emotional, can become a good thing because it lets us know that something is wrong.

Imagine lying in bed at 3:30 in the morning, when all of the sudden the smoke detector startles you out of a sound sleep. What do you do? Do you reach under your bed for the biggest shoe you can find, run over to the smoke detector, and smash it to pieces? No! Why not? Because the problem is not with the smoke detector, the problem is with the fire.

For example, what could be the fire in an individual’s life who’s angry all the time? Well, it could be that the fire is that he’s got some sort of idolatrous desire. There’s something that he wants, maybe it’s even a good thing, but he wants that good thing so much that he’s willing to either sin in order to get it, or in the case of sinful anger, it could be that he’s willing to sin when he’s not able to have what his heart longs for and craves and desires.

Mike:
Lou, that really takes us to the heart of the anger, doesn’t it? Thanks for sharing that insight with our listeners! We’ll have more next time. And until then, I’m Mike Smith.